7 Ways to Get Your Voice in the (Meeting) Room
“Once again,” she said, “I totally nailed it in this meeting. Drum roll, please…I was confident, prepared, and got all of my ideas and suggestions out on the table…”
This is what I always hope my coaching clients are going to say. Unfortunately, in a recent session, this particular client — let’s call her ‘Eva’ — detailed to me how she had sat silently on Zoom again, watching her colleagues’ ping pong game of ideas and waiting patiently to interject with her thoughts. Each passing moment only served to increase her nerves about saying the wrong thing or speaking out of turn. By the end of the meeting, she felt just like a freshly warmed slice of bread, ejected like dry toast.
I recently wrote another blog about how people overestimate the attention they are receiving from others, which can cause anxiety about speaking up at work: also known as spotlight theory. This is a common phenomenon, but one that you can certainly overcome; so if you’re in the same boat as Eva, here are seven ideas to shift your perspective and increase your presence in meetings.
Prep Ahead
Rehearse something you want to say before the meeting. Studies show that people self-censor because they are afraid of coming across as less knowledgeable, capable, and competent. But all voices need to be in the (Zoom) room, so make sure that yours is warmed up and ready to share.
You Complete Me
(Not in the Jerry Maguire way, but close…) You don’t always need to have a fully fleshed out idea before speaking up. Oftentimes your seed of a thought might spark an idea for someone else. Consider starting with: “Here are my initial thoughts…” and invite other perspectives from your colleagues.
Use your Pen Pal
Putting pen to paper during a meeting can help you focus, keep track of what is being said, and recall better later — rather than trying to get it all down on your laptop. You can also jot down a few key sentences in your notebook to keep you engaged, which might be helpful if you struggle with forgetting what you want to share once you’re in the room.
Mind the Gap
Look out for what’s not being said. What are some important perspectives that might be missing? Chase the gaps in the meeting — there are usually one or two.
Buddy Up
Speaking of gaps: is there someone else on the team whose voice is also missing from meetings? Consider teaming up and giving each other some signals, encouraging words, or shared ideas to overcome the nerves together.
Make Bling your Thing
I recently shared this trick with another coaching client: find an object that you associate with positivity and calm, and use it as an anchor to remind yourself to bring your voice into the room. This approach is known as mental anchoring. She started wearing a colourful bracelet to her meetings, which represented the beauty of her voice in the room; she could look down at it during meetings for an immediate confidence boost.
Rev Up Your Reading
For more tips, here are a few additional articles on this topic:
How to Talk in Meetings When You Hate Talking in Meetings
How to Overcome Fear of Speaking in Meetings
Afraid to Speak Up in Meetings? Here are 7 Tips
When in doubt, keep this in mind: everyone in the room has a unique and valuable perspective, and you are the only one who can share yours. The more you get used to hearing your voice in the room, the easier it will become to freely share your thoughts — so grab your ping pong paddle and keep practicing!
With joy,
Dr. Helen
